kids and sugar

Kids & Sugar: Finding The Right Balance

It’s no secret that dating with kids is difficult. But sugar dating with kids is probably five times harder! Learn my tips for safely mixing mommy time with sugar dating.

Not telling your partner you have a kid(s) is probably the worst thing you can do in a new arrangement. On the other hand, communicating to a kid that there’s a new parental figure in the picture way too early could welcome its own long-term effects. Let’s start with transparency to keep things balanced.

Transparent Parent

First of all, the base of every healthy sugar relationship is honesty. Being upfront with your new sugar partner means equality is established on both ends. Ideally, before you and your partner decide to kick things off, family arrangements should be addressed.

Furthermore, a partner who is recently separated or maintains partial child custody could have strict time commitments each week. Knowing these details helps to avoid arguments, general confusion, and missed connections. All of the above can easily kill the steamy sugar vibe.

Clarify Schedules

Are weeknights off-limits? Does a weekend getaway require a 48-hr notice? These are simple feeler questions that can help with arranging childcare.

Most importantly, being clued into family commitments and relationship needs ensures that you and your sugar partner are on the same page regarding busy schedules. Popular apps such as Care.com or Urban Sitter are great for last-minute sitter services.

Look For Signals

Don’t. Be. Pushy.

New Sugar Daddy (or Mama) arrangements are exciting. You’ll likely want to gush about your day-to-day to feel like you’re both in the loop with each other. But beware, some partners may feel annoyed hearing you gush about how little Jimmy earned a gold star in class. These are details that kill the escape-from-reality moment.

Additionally, consider that your sugar partner likely has kids and a family of their own. Children should certainly be acknowledged, but there are limits and boundaries in a sugar relationship. An arrangement should be an escape from reality. Not a new extension with added responsibilities.

Natural Introductions

Lastly, each parent learns that kids are highly impressionable. Introducing your little ones to a sugar partner can add a layer of stress to even the strongest of relationships. The introduction creates an unsaid expectation of commitment. Kids need consistency, and with sugar erring on the side of spontaneous, things could easily get sticky.

It’s best to hold-off on making an introduction until your partner brings up their interest to you. If they’re serious, a date will be set. If a year goes by and there’s no follow-through–actions speak louder than words!

 

What advice would you pass along to sugar seekers dating with kids?

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